At Brilliant Read Media, it is our constant endeavour to identify and share some of the unique and compelling stories from the startup ecosystem. As part of this, we invited Nivvedita Ssahu for an interview with Brilliant Read Media. To say it further, Nivvedita is an Inner Child & Trauma Healing Coach and a Content Creator. Let’s learn more about her background, inspiring journey so far and her advice for our growing community!
Excerpts from our exclusive interview with Nivvedita:
Your work focuses on helping people break toxic cycles. What first inspired you to step into inner child and trauma healing?
Thank you for asking this. My journey into healing came from my own lived experience.
For most of my life, I carried deep emotional pain and trauma without fully understanding it. During my school years, I was physically present, but emotionally, I felt invisible. I struggled to express myself, feared speaking to teachers or classmates, and constantly felt unsafe around people. Fear was deeply rooted within me.
Alongside this, people-pleasing became a huge part of my identity. I constantly sought validation and spent nearly 27–28 years living in survival mode. Instead of actively participating in life, I spent most of my time observing it from the sidelines, trying to stay emotionally safe and make others happy.
Growing up, I also carried a painful sense of not belonging. Whether it was among cousins or at school, I often felt left out. I spent a lot of time questioning myself: Why am I like this? Will I always feel this way?
Everything shifted in 2023 during one of the most difficult phases of my life. I felt deeply disconnected in my corporate job and kept asking myself bigger questions: Why am I here? What is my purpose?
That’s when healing entered my life.
Through inner child healing, I realized something life-changing many of the fears, behaviors, and coping mechanisms I carried were not who I truly was. They were responses shaped by my environment, experiences, and conditioning.
As I started healing, I slowly met a freer version of myself someone who had always existed but never felt safe enough to emerge.
Today, I no longer live from people-pleasing, anxiety, or constant validation-seeking. I’ve found my voice, confidence, and emotional stability.
When I experienced that transformation, I knew I wanted to help others heal sooner so they don’t spend decades merely surviving before realising that healing and freedom were possible all along.
Many people carry emotional wounds without realising it. What are some subtle signs of unresolved trauma?
One of the biggest challenges with unresolved trauma is that it often becomes so familiar that people mistake it for personality.
Many people say, “This is just who I am,” without realising that what they’re experiencing may actually be survival patterns.
Some subtle signs include:
1. Low Confidence or Feeling Voiceless
People struggle to express themselves, speak up, or feel comfortable being seen. Often, this comes from childhood environments where emotional safety was missing.
2. Self-Sabotage & a Harsh Inner Critic
Even receiving appreciation feels uncomfortable. Instead of encouraging themselves, people constantly criticise themselves, often because criticism was normalised growing up.
3. Constant Fear or Anxiety
Some people always expect something bad to happen, even when life is stable. This hypervigilance often develops in chaotic or emotionally unstable environments.
4. People-Pleasing
This is one of the most common trauma responses. People struggle to say “no,” feel guilty setting boundaries, and seek validation externally because they don’t fully recognise their own worth.
5. Indecisiveness
Even simple decisions feel overwhelming. Often, this stems from childhood environments where choices were controlled, or opinions weren’t encouraged.
6. Caretaker Patterns
Some children were emotionally responsible for their parents growing up. As adults, they overgive in relationships and often feel emotionally exhausted or disappointed.
7. Overachiever Tendencies
Many people constantly push themselves because they grew up feeling “not enough” or being compared to others. Rest feels unfamiliar, and productivity becomes tied to self-worth.
These signs may seem normal from the outside, but often they point to deeper emotional wounds that deserve attention and healing.
What does “feeling emotionally safe” truly mean, especially in relationships and daily life?
For me, emotional safety started when I stopped feeling responsible for everyone else’s emotions.
Earlier, I felt like I had to fix everything and make everyone happy. Healing helped me understand that I could care for people without carrying emotional responsibility for everyone around me.
I also noticed major shifts in difficult conversations. Earlier, my body would react with fear, anxiety, shaking, and avoidance. But over time, I learned that difficult conversations are simply part of life.
Today, emotional safety means:
– Not overthinking every action
– Not carrying responsibility for everyone else’s emotions
– Trusting yourself deeply
– Respecting yourself without constantly seeking approval
– Being okay with people entering or leaving your life
– Knowing when to rest without guilt
In relationships, emotional safety means no longer chasing reassurance or operating from fear of abandonment.
You enjoy someone’s presence, but you also enjoy your own.
In everyday life, emotional safety means learning how to regulate yourself. Difficult emotions may still arise, but instead of getting consumed by them, you ask: “What is this situation trying to teach me?”
To me, emotional safety is the shift from survival mode to truly participating in life.
How does inner child healing transform the way people see themselves and others?
Before healing, many people see themselves through other people’s eyes.
Their self-worth becomes dependent on validation, approval, or acceptance. They unconsciously try to fill emotional gaps left from childhood.
Inner child healing changes that.
The focus shifts from:
“How are others seeing me?”
to
“How do I see myself?”
People begin replacing self-criticism with self-compassion. They start recognising their gifts, honouring their needs, and prioritising self-respect.
Healing also changes relationships.
You stop taking everything personally. Compassion increases because you begin realising that everyone is carrying unseen wounds.
A healed person still feels deeply, but they become emotionally aware rather than emotionally reactive.
Healing also changes how people view life itself. They become less fearful, more trusting, and more open to possibilities.
Ultimately, healing transforms not just your self-image but your entire relationship with life.
Why do people often repeat the same unhealthy relationship patterns even when they genuinely want change?
Because healing is deeper than willpower.
Many people genuinely want healthier relationships, but their nervous system may still be operating from survival mode.
We unconsciously repeat what feels familiar.
If someone grew up around emotional instability, criticism, control, or inconsistency, they may unknowingly recreate those patterns in adulthood, not because they want pain, but because the nervous system recognises familiarity as safety.
Healing helps people unlearn these patterns.
As emotional safety grows internally, relationships begin changing naturally. Someone who constantly feared abandonment becomes more secure. Someone who needed control learns trust.
And sometimes healing also brings another realisation: not every relationship is meant to stay.
When healing happens deeply, change becomes more natural because it starts from within not just at the surface level.
What is one of the biggest misconceptions people have about trauma healing and emotional work?
One of the biggest misconceptions is that healing is only about fixing mental health.
Healing is much deeper than that.
It’s about understanding emotional patterns, behaviours, conditioning, and the unseen experiences shaping our lives.
Someone may appear successful externally a great career, financial stability, achievements but still struggle internally with fear, people-pleasing, anxiety, or emotional disconnection.
Healing is not about labelling someone as broken.
It is about becoming emotionally aware and reconnecting with yourself in a more aligned, compassionate way.
At its core, healing is less about fixing and more about understanding.
What are the first steps someone can take toward healing emotional pain or childhood conditioning?
The first step is awareness.
Many of our emotional patterns, fears, and beliefs operate unconsciously. We often assume, “This is just who I am,” without realising that some of these patterns may have been shaped by childhood experiences, family dynamics, or past emotional wounds. Awareness helps us identify what is truly ours and what was learned as a survival response.
The second step is acknowledgement.
Healing begins when we stop minimising, avoiding, or suppressing our emotions and instead allow ourselves to honestly acknowledge our experiences and their impact on our lives. What we resist often persists; what we acknowledge can begin to heal.
The third step is self-compassion.
Many people carry a harsh inner critic and judge themselves for their struggles. Healing requires learning to meet ourselves with the same kindness, patience, and understanding that we would offer to someone we deeply love.
Over time, deeper healing practices such as forgiveness, boundary-setting, emotional regulation, and inner child work can become part of the journey. But healing doesn’t begin with changing who you are—it begins with understanding yourself more deeply and creating a safe space within yourself to grow.
If you could leave people with one powerful message about healing and self-worth, what would it be?
Don’t choose healing because you think something is wrong with you.
Choose healing because you deserve to live life fully.
Choose healing not only for yourself but for the generations that come after you.
Many generations before us carried emotional pain without having the awareness or language for healing. Today, we have an opportunity to break unhealthy cycles instead of passing them forward.
And most importantly, remember this:
Healing is not about becoming someone else. It is about coming back to who you truly are.
At BrilliantRead, we don’t just share startup stories; we bring you journeys that challenge perspectives, spark ideas, and fuel ambition. Every story we feature is carefully chosen to add real value, inspire action, and ignite possibility within our growing community of entrepreneurs and dreamers.
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